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Antara Prakash, 25, decided to write to herself at 13 because that was the age when she “was beginning to notice shifts in my mindset. I was noticing different interactions with friends, and how much importance is placed on your self-image Continue reading
Posted in Fear, Friendship, Health, Identity, Letters
Tagged a letter to my younger self, dear me, Fear, gratitude, identity, letters to my younger self
We had our father’s 89th birthday celebration over Memorial Day weekend this year. My brother, three sisters and I had planned on a 90th birthday bash, but our stepmother suggested this year might be better. There would be a better chance of Dad being able to enjoy it. Continue reading
Posted in Ellyn's Blog, Family, Health
Tagged Ellyn Spragins, family, fathers, letters to my younger self, Love, motherhood
This letter was written by Susan Achey at 42 years old to herself at the age of 32.
She had the life she always dreamed of working as a copywriter at an advertising agency in New York City. But the rug was pulled out from under her. Continue reading
This letter was created for the book “What I Know Now About Success.”
If you had met Paula Deen in high school in Albany, Georgia, you wouldn’t have been the least bit surprised. Paulann Hiers had the personality you know: gregarious, bubbly, and funny. As captain of the cheerleading squad, she was practically royalty in the South of the 1960s. “Life was just so great. I had so many friends,” recalls Paula. Continue reading
This is a letter from Donna Cryer, CEO of CryerHealth, a patient-centric public relations firm in Washington DC. Donna was educated at Harvard and Georgetown law school, where she was president of the student bar association. Continue reading
Posted in Career, Health, Spirituality, Strength
Tagged career, Health, Spirituality, Strength
Jacqueline McGrath is an Executive Sales Director of Epicure from Calgary, Alberta. She joined Epicure Selections in April of 1997, which was a pretty tough year for her. Her husband was out of work and her father-in-law was losing his battle with cancer. Although she loved the work with Epicure, she worried because so many people questioned her choice. “It made me hide for a while,” she explained to Ellyn. “If people asked me what I was doing, I wasn’t proud to say I’m an Epicure consultant, because everyone thought that it wasn’t a business, it was just a hobby.” Continue reading
This is a letter by Veronica Schoen at age 23 to her younger self at 17.
Dear Veronica,
You are in a very dark place, and you don’t know how to escape. You are a prisoner inside your own head, telling yourself life isn’t worth it. You’re in an abusive relationship with your boyfriend, and will be for two and a half years, because in your mind he is the only one who loves you. Your parents are going through a divorce, and have more on their minds than you.
You will leave your boyfriend with the help of a school counselor. But then you jump into another guy’s arms six months later, who will mentally abuse you for four years. Life seems to carry nothing but pain. The only thing you don’t realize is that you are creating it all for yourself. Not once do you believe that you are beautiful, funny, intelligent, or that there is a purpose for your existence. The physical pain you once did to yourself, the drug abuse to find an escape, was never the real you. You didn’t want to live past the age of 21, because you thought the pain was never going to end.
Well, guess what Veronica, you are 23 now, and you are still here. You made it. You gave yourself a second chance to live, because you got rid of everything standing in your way. The people you allowed to have such a huge effect on you are gone. The pain in your heart is now gone.
You are, and always will be, a beautiful, funny, intelligent person, and your existence does matter. You know how hard life can be, but you have the tools to overcome it from now on. Yes, you learned everything very young, but your past is what made you. Before, life was a burden, and now it is nothing but endless possibilities. Here’s to you, Veronica, for being someone at the age of 23 who you would have looked up to at the age of 16, when all this started to happen.
With neverending amounts of love,
Veronica
This was written by Marie McNamara at age 40 in West Hartford, Connecticut to herself at age 23.
It was just after college when Marie was still trying to figure out what she was doing in life. Those years were very blurry – she had no idea in what direction she was heading. At times she was living with her parents, but staying with friends on weekends and was afraid of making a commitment to anything.
______________________________________________________________________
Dear Marie,
You just received a phone call that one of your college roommates was in a car accident. She’s in a New Haven hospital with a shattered pelvis. Pins had to be put in to hold it together.
Sure, you lost touch with each other this past year. You don’t even know the name of the boy she was with.
What was she doing in the back of that Jeep? And just where is Saint Raphael’s? Not THAT part of the city. What if you get lost?
You call her mother and she doesn’t call you back. You don’t know where to go. Plus, you hate hospitals. And what if you cry? The excuses start building, as always. What you don’t realize is that 17 years later you will have only seen her twice. Boy, you will miss her.
Marie – GO. Call the hospital, ask for directions and get in that little red Honda. You are so much stronger than you think. Just show up. This will become your mantra.
In the years ahead, you will find yourself happily married with young children. You will become the constant contact between your four brothers when you find out that dad has bladder cancer. You will pick up your father from various doctor’s appointments, with three kids under four years old strapped in their seats. You will help your mother deal with his side effects of chemotherapy and keep all of the doctor’s orders straight. You will confidently drive through the “bad” part of the city, seven months pregnant to visit him every day as that cruel disease takes him faster than any of you expected. You will stand up and give part of his eulogy and, eight weeks later, give birth to your fourth child, a beautiful little girl with his big brown eyes.
You are capable of so much more than you think.
Just show up.
Marie
Posted in Family, Friendship, Health, Letters, Support
Tagged family, Friendship, Health, Support
Terra Larsen is an Executive Sales Director of Epicure Selections from Campbell River, British Columbia. She started her business in April, 1998 and has been among the top three saleswomen in her category in 1998, 2001, 2003, 2004 and 2005. She has also been a Top Sponsor and Top Sales company-wide for many years, and was voted for Epicure’s Caring and Sharing award. Before Epicure, she was an accountant at a land development company where her career was going great guns. By 1997, she had been there seven years, and was negotiating many of the company’s real estate deals. She was a staunch perfectionist, she said. “I was such a serious person. Life was about rules.”
Along came a fellow named Jeremy, who was on the company’s construction team. He was a lot of fun and seven years younger than Terra. He asked her out approximately 10 times before she said: “Okay. But only this once.”
Terra had previously run away from two different marriage proposals. She obviously wasn’t eager for a serious relationship. However, Jeremy’s persistence persuaded her and, after a long engagement, they married. She was afraid of making the wrong choices and ending up divorced, like her parents.
Not long after the marriage, Terra found herself pregnant, despite her many precautions and her plans to travel extensively with Jeremy before they became parents. This shook the couple up. But not nearly as much as the birth of their daughter, Aysha, who cried unrelentingly for four months. “People would spend a little time around her,” Terra remembers, “and then they’d flee, family included.” She and Jeremy were soon exhausted and emotionally depleted. “As much as we both loved her, if we could have changed our minds at this point, and given her back, I would have to say we might have.”
Terra, now 42, is writing to her younger self eleven years ago, when she was 31 and going to doctor’s appointments after doctor’s appointments trying to figure out what was wrong with Aysha.
Dear Terra,
This is sheer misery. You are exhausted from lack of sleep and your nerves are frayed from Aysha’s continual, unremitting wail. But far worse than the physical toll is the psychological pain. How heartbreaking it is to feel like a complete failure as a mother. You feel utterly unable to help this infant.
Colic. Everyone says she has colic. The doctors and nurses give you a condescending look that says, “Welcome to motherhood.” Yet your instincts tell you something is terribly wrong. And deep inside, the anger is mounting. All you hear from other moms is that it’s such a joy to be a new mother. Why is everyone so close-mouthed about nursing, crying–all the awful parts? It makes you feel like a monster.
My dear, poor Terra. I don’t doubt you. And I don’t blame you. It is okay to feel terrible. Really, it is. You are not the only mother in the world who has felt this way.
Trust those instincts of yours. They are correct: Something is terribly wrong. Aysha has a split abdominal muscle that pinches her intestines causing great pain. It will take even more visits to the hospital before a nurse will see this condition and—finally—believe you. Finally, you and Jeremy will get some relief.
Unfortunately, by then both of you will feel like you’ve been through a war. And your marriage will be a casualty of this experience. You’ll feel enormous guilt over your feelings about Aysha, and this will be compounded by remorse about choosing to end your marriage.
But these experiences will change you for the better. You’ll no longer be a rule-bound person. You’ll become very flexible. You’ll trust your instincts. You needed these kinds of extreme experiences in order to free you from your straight-jacketed ideas about life.
But the greatest benefit is the one that you will finally confer upon yourself: being at peace with your choices. In time you’ll recognize that ending the marriage was not only good for you, it was good for Aysha. How? Because you and Jeremy will excel at co-parenting, as separate people. But together, you never could have made it work.
With serenity, at last,
Terra
Posted in Control, Fear, Health, Letters, Motherhood
Tagged Control, Health, motherhood
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