Linda Lombri had just returned from China with her 8-month-old daughter Anita whom she had adopted there. It was the fulfilment of a lifelong dream.
They were living in a large one-bedroom apartment in Park Slope, Brooklyn. They shared the bedroom. Linda was working as a marketing manager for a packaging company in Queens, commuting via subway for one hour each way, since she did not own a car.
After finishing her 2-month Family Leave (all she could afford to take unpaid), Linda expected to work part-time through the summer months to spend more time with her baby. That did not happen – her boss changed his mind.
Looking back, she still regrets that she did not work past her fears about money, quit her job, and find something closer to home. They were living in the right place, but she was not working in the right place – at least in terms of logistics.
Linda could have made her life easier – hers and Anita’s. This is her letter to her younger self at age 47.
You are at a point in your life when you have just taken a leap of faith. You are the mother you always wanted to be – even though you are now considered (by others) middle-aged at 47.
Don’t stop now. You must believe in yourself and listen to your inner voice. I know you are too scared to change jobs to find something closer to home. You think you don’t have choices. Or that you will not find a job that will be fulfilling AND be able to feed and raise your child.
Stop worrying! Stop regretting! Take action and have faith that things could turn out fine. You didn’t listen to the great aunt who said you were too old to be a mom. So, turn off that outside voice now, and tune into your inner knowing.
You will never know how it will turn out unless you stop hesitating and start doing. Each road you might take could have bumps and turns. But the path you are afraid of just might lead you where you need to go.
So, relax. Have faith in yourself again. Follow your inner voice. Someday you will discover that this voice is right more often than it is not. And, anyway, you can always change again. You are resilient – more than you know. So stop worrying about the safer road. Things will turn out okay.
With compassion and confidence in you,